Today I was going to write a quick update aptly titled 200 down, 24 to go! with an picture of me holding a giant stack of sewed fabric. But, my story quickly changed last night when Lou yelled up to me “Hey, you got a package in the mail from Jenny!” First of all, I was doubled over in excitement that I actually got a package in the mail. I think I did a little happy dance, but I can’t be sure of that. Secondly, my thoughts instantly went to… did I forget anything at her house that she had to send back to me?
I retrieved the box and carefully opened it. And I literally, literally could feel tears of joy welling up in my eyes. She had sent me memories: Fabrics, pictures and wonderful things, all from Audi’s house. I immediately pulled out a small coffee creamer, and a note that read “One of gram’s coffee creamers (DO NOT put a carton on the table anymore!!!). I laughed out loud as tears streamed down my face. I dug deeper into the box and pulled out pictures: The ones that I used to stare at aimlessly in the hallway in between the bedrooms. Deeper still, I found stacks of fabrics from around her house: The curtains from the guest bedroom, pillowcases from sleepovers and fabric from the armchair.
For about 20 or 30 minutes, I went through everything… reading and rereading notes that Jenny wrote to me, looking at pictures, feeling the fabric. I’m pretty sure I was fantasizing about asking people over for coffee, seeing that I now possessed a prized creamer. I felt like I was back in her house. And that felt so nice.
Tonight I’ll hang up all the family pictures that Jenny sent to me in my art/sewing room, but only after I pour myself a cup of coffee, with half n’ half from my new creamer. Twenty four squares will be made out of the fabric that she sent to me. Call it a coincidence, but that’s one square for every one year that I got to spend with Audi. Honestly, I don’t think it’s a coincidence at all. I think there are other forces about. I think it’s love.
Let this be a lesson for everyone. A simple thought or gesture, no matter how big or small, can lift a person’s spirits and (re)fill their heart with love, enthusiasm and faith. What an incredible gift she gave to me, as I was struggling with anxiety and gradually loosing my faith in humanity. Boy was I wrong about it all.
